I’m not pregnant

So replaying the day’s events, I think I was asked if I was pregnant.  
I am not.

I’ve been swimming a couple times a week.
(I’ve been running and walking too…but that’s not part of this story.
Clearly it should be…as in I need to do more of it….)
So I am horrible at swimming.
Also not really the point of this story…but  then again, maybe it is…..

Anyway, here I am…going to the Y….swimming.
There are 3 lap lanes and the other half of the pool is for water aerobics.
Sometimes, there are more than 3 people who want to swim laps, so you have to share a lane.

Enter: Colorado Boy
That’s what I call him in my mind.
I know 2 things about Colorado Boy.
#1. He is from Colorado.
#2. He is the only man at the Y that actually wears a speedo.

I know this because one day I ended up sharing a lane with him.
It was like 105 degrees that day…or 93…or 89 or some other non-fall-ish temperature.
Colorado Boy: “So, is it always this nice in November?”
Me: “Nope. This is pretty hot for November.”
Colorado Boy: “I’m from Colorado, so I think this is pretty nice.”

And well, the speedo….I don’t think that should need an explanation.
I’m really glad my husband wears swim trunks.

Okay, so now you have our complete history.

Back to swimming at the Y.
A friend of mine has been meeting me there.
She is pregnant.
And she’s cute and tiny.
She’d tell you otherwise…but trust me.
She’s tiny. And cute.
(And she knows how to swim and has been giving me tips.)

So today, I got there 6 hours before her.
Because I have to swim for 6 whole hours to even come close to the same distance as she swims in 1 hour.
Alright, alright…maybe it was only a few minutes ahead of her…whatever.
I was in the water and had swam a few laps before she arrived.
I was in the water.
She is standing at the end of our lane getting ready when Colorado Boy shows up.

And he says. “Oh you’re pregnant.”
Notice: statement. Not question.
“How far along are you guys?”
Notice: use of plural.

He was totally talking to both of us.

My friend said,
“I’m just over half way.”
I did not say,
“I’m not pregnant, I’m just fat.”
He said “Oh, my wife is pregnant….blah blah blah.”

So now I know 3 things about him.
#1. He is from Colorado.
#2. He wears a speedo.
#3. His wife is pregnant.

Gesh. His wife is pregnant.
He should know the difference between a pregnant and non-pregnant person.


I was in the water.
That’s my story….and I’m stickin’ to it.


(Sorry for the lack of pictures,
Clearly you do not want to see a picture of me in my swimsuit.  
Apparently I look pregnant.)



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20 Responses to “I’m not pregnant”

  1. 1 amy November 18, 2009 at 12:51 am

    I think most men just assume all pregnant women congregate. Maybe he thought you were in some pregnant lady swimming club together? lol My husband does that sort of thing all the time.

  2. 3 craftapple November 18, 2009 at 1:08 am

    Nah – he wasn’t talking about you! You do NOT look pregnant. Is it possible he mean “you guys” as in her and her husband? The same way some people say “we” are pregnant?

  3. 5 Tootsie Marie November 18, 2009 at 6:30 am

    ummmmm….. what a dork! You have gotten tiny lately! Seriously! You have no tummy! I don’t know what he might have meant, but you do NOT look pregnant! wow!

  4. 7 Jan November 18, 2009 at 7:11 am

    The guy’s a jerk, pure and simple. Sheesh. Love the 6 hours statement.

    • 8 Melanie November 18, 2009 at 10:00 am

      he he – like that? it feels like that. It seriously takes me longer to do a 50 than it does for her to do 100. BUT I am making so much progress. Like I am putting my face in the water…..that is huge for me! So let’s focus on the positive…right?!?!?

  5. 9 Andrea November 18, 2009 at 10:23 am

    I was raised in Minnesota and the term “you guys” is a generic reference that is used by a lot of ‘Northerners’. (Kind of like “ya’ll” in the South.) He wasn’t refering to you, but to your friend and her spouse/partner/boyfriend. When I moved to the South, I soon learned to stop using the term, too many confused people!

  6. 11 Elena November 18, 2009 at 11:47 am

    Lol, I was analyzing it yesterday too! My thought was the same as Amy’s, that he thought that pg women workout together, so he just assumed. His wife is pg, so I think he’s seeing the world through “rose-colored glasses” so to speak. You definitely DON’T look pregnant 🙂

    p.s. I called him “Colorado boy” too, until I learned he’s doing the Iron Man this weekend. So now he’s “Colorado Iron Man”.

  7. 13 rachelle November 18, 2009 at 4:42 pm

    Maybe he said “you guys” as in you were a couple. Haha j/k that is totally bad, but I am sure he didn’t think you were pregnant. Though if he did, it happens to the best of us. I’ve been asked more than once in my life time 😉

  8. 15 LAW November 18, 2009 at 5:18 pm

    I am sorry to laugh at your expense…. But I did laugh…hard. I have nothing more to add — the others beat me to my comments. I just agree with all of the above statements. 🙂

  9. 17 Jana November 19, 2009 at 9:56 am

    If it makes you feel better, I am 35 weeks pregnant, and on Sunday at church, someone I see every week said “Oh my gosh! You’re pregnant? I had no idea!” Yeah. It’s just as bad to be so pregnant and have people not be able to tell.

    • 18 Melanie November 19, 2009 at 12:27 pm

      Oh gosh! Like – where have you been the last few months?!?!? The things we women go through. 🙂 But at least soon you’ll have a cute little new daughter to welcome to your family! I will still have just the fat. lol

  10. 19 Aunt Marie November 19, 2009 at 8:00 pm

    whew, I’m still laughing! THANKS for the fun story! LOVE YOU, Aunt Marie

  11. 20 Jen November 20, 2009 at 1:48 pm

    I’m sorry he said that. I would have taken it the same way you did. But did you ever think that maybe the real issue here is his speedo? Perhaps, his speedo was too tight and it was therefore affecting his ability to think rationally, or to think at all. Perhaps that was an inappropriate comment, but I would definitely wonder about that.

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